St. Mark’s Adult Forum
14 January 2018

 

Questions of Value*

 

‘The really fundamental questions of our lives are not questions of fact or finance but questions of value.’   Patrick Grim, PhD.

 

Character

 

Exactly what is character? The sort of character we hope our kids and grandkids develop. The best place to start is with a blanket definition.

 

Character: The complex of mental and moral qualities distinctive to an individual; strength and originality in a person’s nature; an exemplar – the embodiment or personification – of virtue or vice; a person’s good reputation.

On its face, character is a morally neutral term. We use the term to describe a person’s most prominent attributes; the sum total ofthe features and traits that form an individual’s nature.  Every person, therefore, comes to possess a character. But that would include both scoundrels like Charles Manson and saints like Mother Teresa. As a result, character quickly takes on a moral dimension.

Character is both formed and revealed by how one deals with everyday situations as well as with extraordinary pressures and temptations. For instance, the way we treat people we think can’t help or hurt us – like housekeepers, waiters, and secretaries – tells more about our character than how we treat people we think are important. How we behave when we think no one is looking or when we don’t think we will get caught more accurately portrays our character than what we say or do in service of our reputations.

 

Question: Obviously, character spans a broad spectrum. What constitutes a good character?

 

When we say a person exhibits ‘good character’, we are making a value or moral judgement. Clearly, people of good character need not be perfect. Instead, we look to see if they consistently exhibit worthy traits – integrity, courage, compassion and so on – when it counts. We believe people of good character are guided by ethical principles even when it’s physically dangerous or detrimental to their careers, social standing, or economic well-being. They do the right thing even when it costs more than they want to pay. They rely on ‘moral fortitude’ – one’s ability to discern, trust, and stand behind one’s moral convictions. Of course, our assessment of a person’s character is an opinion and it isn’t always right.

 

Some view character as a mosaic of character traits.  One source offers ‘Six Pillars of Character’, values that transcend cultural, religious, and socioeconomic differences. Those six values are: trustworthiness, respect, responsibility, fairness, caring and citizenship. The ‘Boy Scout Law’ addresses character. A Scout is: trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent. A host of other positive character traits have been identified (see attachment). As you look over the list, you may judge some traits more important than others depending on the social context you find yourself. Is anything missing? You may observe the absence of certain traits; for example, those that reflect religious virtues such as piety, obedience, prudence, charity, humility, and others.

 

Question: How might one acquire a good character?

 

No one is born with good character; it’s not a hereditary trait. And it isn’t determined by a single noble act. The core of one’s character is neither innate nor bestowed; it is developed. It doesn’t come easy, it takes practice. Character is established by conscientious adherence to moral values, not by lofty rhetoric or good intentions. In other words, good character is ethics in action; to be effective and worthy of praise, it must become habitual.

Question: Is there a difference between character and reputation?

 

IBecause the shape of a tree’s shadow is determined by the angle of light and the perspective of the observer, it’s not a perfect image of the tree. In the same way, reputation is not always an accurate reflection of character. Oscar Wilde once said, “Sincerity is one of the most important qualities in a person. And once you can fake that you have it made.” This cynical quip explains why some people are able to create a much better reputation than they deserve. By the same token, there are others who deserve better reputations than they have. Whether fair or not, the indisputable truth is that people, companies and institutions are likely to be judged by their last worst act. A word to the wise: A lifetime of building good will can be lost in a moment.

 

Question: Do any examples come to mind?

 

Character building demands perseverance. 2 As the British writer Henry Fairlie put it, “If we acknowledge that our inclination to sin is part of our natures, and that we will never wholly eradicate it, there is at least something for us to do in our lives that will not in the end seem just futile or absurd.” Moral realists recognize this fact. You can see evidence of the inner struggle in such people’s journals. They are exultant on days when they win some small victory over selfishness and hard-heartedness. They are despondent on days when they let themselves (or others) down. They strive to rise above their circumstances; to place the higher thing above the lower thing. The road to character is an unending climb.

 

Our challenge: We all have “a moral responsibility to be more moral every day; to inch ahead each day. In doing so, we build character.

 

Question: We don’t have to go it alone. To help us fulfill our moral responsibility, to whom or what might we turn?

 

 

 

 

 

* Patrick Grim, ‘Questions of Value’, The Teaching Company, 2005

I Michael Josephson, Character- What Is It and Why Is It important, 2015

2 David Brooks, The Road to Character, Penguin Random House, 2015

 

 

Accountable	Adaptable	Adventurous
Alert	Ambitious	Appropriate
Assertive	Astute	Attentive
Authentic	Aware	Bravery
Calm	Candid	Capable
Certain	Charismatic	Clear
Collaborative	Committed	Communicator
Compassion	Comradeship	Connected
Conscious	Considerate	Consistent
Contributes	Cooperative	Courageous
Creative	Curious	Dedicated
Determined	Diplomatic	Directive
Disciplined	Dynamic	Easygoing
Effective	Efficient	Empathetic
Empowers	Energetic	Enthusiastic
Ethical	Excited	Expressive
Facilitates	Fairness	Faithful
Fearless	Flexible	Friendly
Generative	Generosity	Gratitude
Happy	Hard Working	Honest
Honorable	Humorous	Imaginative
Immaculate	Independent	Initiates
Innovative	Inquiring	Inquiring
Integrates	Integrity	Intelligent
Intentional	Interested	Intimate
Joyful	Knowledgeable	Leading
Listener	Lively	Logical
Loving	Loyal	Manages Time Well
Networker	Nurturing	Open-Minded
Optimism	Organized	Patient
Peaceful	Planner	Playful
Poised	Polite	Powerful
Practical	Presents Self Well	Proactive
Problem-Solver	Productive	Punctual
Reliable	Resourceful	Responsible
Self-confident	Self-generating	Self-reliant
Sense of Humor	Sensual	Serves Others
Sincere	Skillful	Spiritual
Spontaneous	Stable	Strong
Successful	Supportive	Tactful
Trusting	Trustworthy	Truthful
Versatile	Vibrant	Warm
Willing	Wise	Zealous